The Great Leap Forward
Strong. Brave. Paralysed.
My brother says ‘You were always strong, brave. I looked up to that. I still do.’
Honestly, I had no idea.
On the inside, it always just feels like a pragmatic weighing up of options and going with the one that will let me sleep at night.
I reveal to a new friend why she’s never known that I write. That I stopped. That I have only just started again.
‘I was paralysed,’ I say. ‘I had my novella rejected eight times, and I had no courage left.’
This essay discusses how I stopped writing and then came back to it. Reading it back a few years after it was published, I am struck by how raw it is – and how long the journey back to writing has actually taken.